DATE NIGHT FRIDAY WITH JAY

                                                 7 Do and Dont's on the First date


Ah, first dates...that most important date, where futures are forged or broken in an instant. But even if you had a good first date, you can't just throw caution to the wind and assume everything will go that way. No, young people, there are ways of playing it safe, playing it cool and playing it right to assess the situation, create a strategy and execute your attack post first date...and my school of thought basically revolves around NOT doing any of that. 




7 DO Feel Out the Situation

It can be hard to figure out exactly how the date went. You'll come across the occasional male/female who's a people pleaser and doesn't have the capacity to let you know he/she didn't feel a connection. Or, you could spend your time with someone who's head over heels for you but doesn't want to let on about it in case it scares you away. And you may not know which person is which. Still, if you like them there are some things to observe that will help you determine where you stand. Did they pay for their half of the meal and then say it was nice meeting you and then peace out pretty quickly? That's a good indication that they had a nice time but didn't think you were a good match for them. Did he/she give you there social security number and then stick their tongue down your throat at the end of the date? I don't want to give out any spoilers, but usually that's a pretty good indication that they liked you.

6 DON'T Feel Like There's a Set Amount of Time to Call


Should you wait a day? A week? Is there some type of algorithm to go by that determines how long you should wait to call based on how well the date went? The answer is no, because you should do whatever feels right. This will come across as natural and not forced in any way (since it's not) and they will appreciate it. Oh, and by "call" I obviously mean text.

5 DON'T Treat Your First Date Like a Means to a Second


No matter how the first date went if you put too much pressure about getting together for a second date, it won't end well. Treat each one as a fun time to get to know her further and go with the flow whether you have two dates two days in a row or you don't see each other for two weeks in between. This way, things will evolve more organically if there isn't that pressure for the "next step


4 DO Remember That Most People Shy Away from Confrontation

This means that if you've been rejected, you most likely won't know for sure because you can't even get a text back to see what's up. The upside is figuring out if you really want to be with someone who's so easily dismissive, preferring to suppress or get rid of things they don't want to deal with. Would you? No, you wouldn't.

3 DON'T Be a A_ _

...by doing the same thing to them. Instead, if they asks, be clear that you don't think the two of you are a good match. It's not hard; compliment he/she on their good qualities, let them know why you don't feel you're right for each other (be careful not to be too vague and come across like you're your own publicist and don't be too specific unless you want to hurt their feelings) and wish them good luck. "Breaking up" is both and art and a science and as with anything else practice makes perfect.

2 Don't put your eggs in one basket

Many daters are seeing multiple people without any commitment until they find something that feels right. Don't feel like you have to stick it out with one person until you do or don't like them enough to change things. Go out more, meet more people and find your ideal match that way. It may take longer to find "the one", but when you do you will have done your "research" and figured out what's best for you.

1 DO Pick a Second Date That's Not a Repeat of the First

If you had coffee on the first date, go ahead and up that to a trip to the park or dinner. This will allow you to get to know each other in a different way. You don't want to come across as someone boring with no imagination. Save that for when you're married.

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